Sorry, But I Never Was; Never Will Be, Either.

I Hit Jamie in the Nuts.

2008-06-14T02:20:55Z

Jera, you really should have been at Youth tonight. The craziest thing happened... it really IS Friday the thirteenth, in the traditional sense XD
It was all very normal at first. We went to the Firehall, I managed to wolf down some food, Teija got a salad because Ben was working tonight (And we all agreed that Ben would probably spit a loogie in it). Katie took a few pictures as James, Blair and Chris got entangled in some crazy fight where, in the end, it sort of looked like Chris was giving birth to Blair (THAT was amazing XD). Alex and I squaredanced in the rain.
As in the title, when I couldn't finish my meal (I ate about... half. Maybe a quarter. Everyone else finished it off), Jamie decided to go and eat it. So, he leaned over me while threatening to drop the food on my head... and I accidentally tilted my chair in a way that I hit the pastor in the balls. It was bloody amazing XD I am so glad that I'm still welcome in church! :P Forgiveness of God. At least he already has a son.
Anywhoo, while we were at the Firehall there was a power outage because of a massive bolt of lightning. Then there was a crack, which Steph and I assumed was from someone dropping a dish in surprise...
Dear Lordy, were we ever wrong!
When we went back to the church, we noticed police cars. There was a small crowd gathered outside of the church and we all thought: Oh my God. Oh my God, the church got hit. I thought I heard someone say that the church not only got hit, but Val was inside at the same time (Heart stopped), but that was misinturpretation.
As it turns out, a tree directly in front of the church got hit. Also, part of the wall blew out.
So... that was the end of Friday the Thirteenth for me. I've never actually gone through one that sucked before, but at the same time it's been pretty wonderful XD

Oh, and earlier that night I was with Cam and Jordan and Ben and Colin and Angela for a while. Nothing much to say about that, really. It was just a little random.

Quoth the Raven: "Nevermore" / Stubborn Chick Admits... Defeat.

2008-06-13T14:45:21Z

Shut up, I never said the post below would be my LAST XD
You know, I'm starting to think that my dad's outbursts of anger are kind of cool... because, by inheriting his temper, I'm starting to kick some major balls. Maybe they're not such a bad thing. Okay, so, about 12 of the people who will read this are going to be emailing me with a: Oh my God, stop being so forgiving or something. Oh well.
You guys all know about the weird things with Britt & I & crows/ravens. I think. Basically, we read our lives by them. I know it seems overly superstisious, and I'm not that kind of person (About some things), but this actually works. A raven on your left is bad luck, on your right it's good luck and if it does anything else than it's all perspective or choice. Trust me, there is NO WAY that this can be mocked. The first time I ever saw a raven, knowing this information, it was on my left, and that day my mom fell down a waterfall. The night after my mom's first date with my dad, a raven flew into the house and would only stay on her left side. My mom saw a raven on her left the day after I told her about this weird sign, and half an hour later her car broke down. There are more things like that, but I don't want to bore you TOO much.
For about a month or two, all I've seen are ravens crossing in front of me...

I didn't want to tell you all this, but I'm in an honest mood... so I might as well. Only Britt and Angela know anything, really. What happened is, last Saturday, I went to Guelph and took a test. The test was to measure where I am (mind-wise), and it would be shown to my teachers and kept in my file, etc. Don't ask me about it, I just took it, I didn't research it (for once) XD. On the way there, I finally told my mom about pretending to be who I am not and failing things on purpose to make people happy. She straight up suggested a therapist (GAG!), and said that she knew one at Walton named... Steph! Yeah, that's right, the same Steph that I've been talking to about all of this crap all along XD I love irony, it runs my entire life.
When I was there, I went for a walk (And that's when the woman giving me the test decided to mark two things: Language and comprehension). The woman told my mom what I got on both, and told her not to tell me (So, of course, on the car ride home, she did). My Language mark was above the marks of people who had finished English courses in University. My Comprehension mark? Apparently, the third woman`s exact words were: ``Ìf there was a grade 18 or 19, she`d be there by now. If they brought 13 back, it wouldn`t challange her.`` She also, apparently, said to my mom that I ``took`` her to places that she had never gone before while answering questions, and was right on most things, just not ``according to the answer key``. I probably bombed the Math and Logic things, though. Oh well.
Theen I saw three ravens, all on the right XD

In three days, I've seen three ravens (All on the right). For three days, I've been thinking: Kay. I want to be myself. Screw this charade, I'm sick of it.
But it's not going to be easy, being myself. Why? Not only is it hard to break a spell, but I'm also potentially battling annorexia. It's not a clinical case, but I can't get myself to eat without gagging my food back up... and I've been losing a LOT of weight. There's only one pair of pants that I own that fit now, and most of my shirts are a size or two too big. Oh well. The more challanges, the more fun. Really "bad" things never bother me, even when I'm in hysterics. Inside, I'm always thinking: Ahahaha, I'm feeling things, I'm alive. Screw all those miscarriages that my mom had, I'm the one who's meant to be here and I'm the one who gets to experiance all this. It's horrible, but at least I'm human. I get to feel something!
Today has been crap so far (Which is odd, because Friday the 13th is usually a decent to good day). I went to Hopedale and called my mom, and she picked me up and we talked. Before you make fun of me for "calling on mommy", think of it this way: Not only do my mom and I get along (Unlike some teenagers), but my mother is the woman with whom legends die. She's proven that only children are not spoiled, that you can turn your life around, that you can be totally different from your parents (They're silver spoon, we're spork city) and have completely different values... it's amazing. She's one of my heroes, though I don't always agree with her. Honestly, idolize and love someone, but keep their flaws in mind, no matter how blind love has always been in all forms it doesn't have to be stupid, too. -__-0
At the end of me explaining everything that has happened lately to her, her eyes were wide. She stared at me. Then she whooped out for the entire world to hear: "FUCK THIS SHIT, BITCH, YOU'RE HEADED TO MOMMY'S BOOT CAMP OF AWESOME". Then we both started to laugh hysterically... I mean, the woman's 54 XD
So, I'm just going to stop thinking. One of my biggest problems is thinking WAY too much; I have to know every single angle or possibility of anything before jumping in (Even though I sometimes do things just to feel pain, because hell, that's life).
The only thing that makes me at all special is that I don't think with my head. I don't follow my heart. I use my stomach. Yes, my stomach is my guiding force (Yeah, I know, I KNOW XD). The grey area -__- If I can't eat, something must be amiss. It grumbles a lot, whether I'm hungry or not, when I'm worried or scared, or trying to figure something else. When everything's good, I have constant adreneline. I think "ma tummeh" is coming in lo-o-o-oud and clear right now. It's saying: "Amanda, shut the fuck up. Just let it go". It's even swearing, for crying out loud, and if any part of me swears...
So, I think I'm going to do it. Somehow. Oh well, I have a full summer to figure it out. Okay. NOW I am probably not going to write in here for a long time. Just thought I'd put that out there. It may take me until next school year to be fully myself, but I'm now so pissed off with myself that I'm just going to give in and give up. I mean, if being irritated by my own fear is what keeps me from being shy etc., then I should have NO problem here.

P.S.: This is for Marina and Teija (You freaks who wanted to know my "Real" Sailor Scouts if I were "Being myself"?). Yeah, I got the two who were CREATED to be polar opposites: Neptune and Moon. I got a few votes for Mars, too (I can HEAR Teija screaming: I knew it, I knew it right now). I think that says enough on it's own XD I'm you two put together! ... Oh, that's a bit weird... XD
"Like your face," Said Ben D. Just thought I'd throw that in, too ;)

P.P.S.: I totally forgot the irony content!
Irony = Rheal is going to try and come back this summer and potentially come to Blakelock next year (Trying to live with his Aunt three blocks away). The Milton - Oakville bus opening this summer. Seeing Britt and Adam tonight, followed by Teija and Angela the next day AND my cousin (The one who has never done anything to me - like steal 500 bucks - and with whom I get along with). Watery, fight, grow, mirror, big (Britt and Angela will get it, garunteed). I'm actually allowed to renovate my room now (After much begging). This just had to happen at the END of a school year, with a lot of thunderstorms happening lately (Ahahaha, stupid symbolism XD). Art program = Blakelock next year (May I say: W00t. Over and over a-fucking-gain). Thom and I are becoming closer again (He used to be my BEEEST friend, though we ALWAYS fought because we both always wanted to be the "leader" of our group), as are George and I (And we all know how important that kid is to me). Dad and I are finally being non-abusive, etc. I think I am FINALLY over my writer's block (Thank. Freaking. God). Ani is coming back to life (How awesome is that?!). There is probably more, I just need to finish off a project right now XD YES, I'M WORKING. SHUT UP. ESPECIALLY YOU, LINDSEY XD I'm also very close to finally convincing my parents to let me get my G-1 (Note: I'm doing it for the standard car. Can you IMAGINE me behind the wheel of our mini-van? It made my mom crack up). Teija recently bought a canoe and she, Angela and I are going to use it all summer (Trust me, this IS irony).
Tearing down the world is how we put things back together. Bit of a shame, though; so many strange little traditions are going to get lost in the construction. Oh well, new ones are cool, too.

~*~Stats~*~

Name: Amanda
Age: 16
Birthday: March 20
Height: 5"0' or 5"1'.
Hobbies: Writing, reading, track & field, painting, swimming, singing, fortune telling, babysitting, complaining about the men in my life, preforming "random acts of kindness", spending time outside, cooking, going out for meals with my friend Angela (The tomboy who I'm almost joined at the hip with), surfing the internet, playing videogames, Youth Group, photography, trying to get my hands on music lessons.
Sports: Track and field, swimming, archery. Sort of dance. I love soccer, but I'm terrible at it, and I used to be great at basketball.
Pets: A dog, and two cats.
Likes: Music is a huge deal (Especially alternative and classical), caramel, the fine line between polar opposites, learning, beautiful things, rollerskating, daydreaming, anything natural, having fun, sarcasm, open-mindedness, history, mythology, Science, candles, elements, SYMBOLISM, fashion, a good story, arguing with my guy friends, witches, horror movies, getting things done, being punctual, nature, massive challanges, fairytales, really weird animals and scientific facts, ravens, scythes, planets, Halloween, cards, pirates... -rambles-.
Dislikes: Closed-mindedness, stupidity, ignorance, most cynical things, injustice, cruelty, underestimation, having things chosen FOR me, being called "Princess" or "Mandy" (Unless it's by Ben), pop quizzes, focusing, eating, logic, math, fairy tale love stories.
Strong points: Creative, strong willed, somewhat sarcastic, brave, caring, highly intuitive, adventurous, maternal, contradictory, artistic, bubbly, (there is no one word for this) I can't put up with my weaknesses and set out to change them, very stubborn, patient, imaginative, curious.
Weaker points: Very shy (Though I force myself to talk to everyone), horrible with logic and maths, gullible, too self-sacrificing, highly impressionable, overly sensitive, complainer, pretends to be clumsy, seems exessively ditzy, lazy, a little too romantic. My worst quality is my "front", which is of a whiney, clumsy, stupid girl focused only on play and imagination... I can assure you, that girl isn't me. (It's a long story as to why I act this way, and I'm trying to make the facade go away).

~*~Favorites~*~

Color: All of them. I tend to choose orange or yellow when I need to choose a colour for a project or something, though. Sometimes blue or green. Pink is a little bit of an issue.
Food: Rice, tomato soup, sandwiches, apple pie, curry, tea, spicy foods.
Animal: I'm fond of all animals. My best friend calls me "Raven" because of my dark hair, though (Dyed it red).
Season(summer, spring, fall, winter): All of them? I don't know. I was born in Spring, so let's just say that's it.
Fruit: Apples, bananas (How cheesy) and cherries. Tomatoes and cucumbers are also good (Yes, they ARE fruits).
Flavor: Depends on my mood.
Smell: Lilacs, pumpkin spice, gasoline, snow (it has a smell, trust me), that ferral smell on a rainy day, fresh cut grass, paper.

~*~Extra~*~

If you were stranded on a desert Island, what 5 things would you bring? My iPod, a laptop, a waterbottle, a notebook (with a pencil), and a hat. If I could choose six, I'd bring a dodgeball to name "Wilson".

Describe yourself in one word: Hmm... colourful.

Leader or Follower?: I tend to be thrown into the leader position a lot, but I also like to step down and let other people have their go at it. I'm not picky; I can do either easily. If I see a situation that's absolutely out of control under the hand of another, though, I can't help but step in.

Which element do you most identify with? (come on people... Don't just pick the element of your favorite scout... be honest!!) My friends and I are all very interested in elements, and most of them have descided which ones they correspond to... mine remains a mystery to everyone, because apparently I "could be anything". I'll just say "Light". Maybe "Lightning", because that would certainly explain the frizzy hair.

Are you an energetic person or are you a lower energy level kind of person? Definitely energetic. I wake up this happy. It makes my mom sick XD In the morning, it's like Donna Reid (me) and Margo Kidder (mom) are living in the same house.

Habits?: I touch my hand to my mouth a lot, over-analyze things, take a book with me everywhere, pick out at least one person in every room to aspire to be like, whine and complain, laugh a lot and smile more than almost anyone I know. I also tend to be massively lazy, to the point that I'm failing almost everything because I haven't done the work (When I DO do stuff, I get nineties, so don't laugh :P).

Do you act more on impulse or do you tend to think things through? I like to think things through, though (when it comes to people) I pretend to be impulsive. If someone were upset, I would "impulsively" skip a class and cheer them up... really, I would have already thought about what the person means to me, what I think they want, etc. before choosing to do that.

Got any dreams or aspirations? Oh, tons. I want to have a family, I want to write, dance, paint, find myself... I think the biggest thing is to help others, though. It would also be very nice to finally learn how to play the violin (Or guitar. Or piano. Or go back to "excelling" in Clarinet, even though I got bored with it). A better question would probably be: "What DON'T You Dream?"

What would you say is your motto? "It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to."; "If you fall down, pretend nothing happened and get back up"; "Do everything that you said you would never do at least once (Save for something dumb, like stealing someone's boyfriend or drinking)"; "NEVER WEAR PINK"; "Live and Learn"; "Somethings aren't as stupid as they sound."

What motivates you to start your day? -Sigh- Do I have to actually answer this? I don't need motivation; I wake up because I want to, because I love the world and every single person in it, no matter who they are or what they've done. Someone could beat me into the ground and I would still adore them... everyone that I know is someone that I want to be, to see what they're like on the inside out and also because I admire EVERYONE.

I don't have any pictures of myself. I have very dark, curly brown hair that turns red and blonde in the sunlight (Weird, heh?), a slightly large nose, a small mouth, very pale white skin. I'm also pretty short, and (for my size) my calves are MASSIVE. My eyes have decided to go and start changing; they used to be small and black-brown with tiny pupils, and now they're a little bit bigger (just a bit), a very light brown and have massive pupils... that happened in about six months.

That was the profile I put up on the Sailor Scout thing. Just an FYI. It's not much new; seriously, the only way that I'm not "myself" with you all is in how I actually act, not in the stats.

P.P.P.S.: Might as well finish the day off. The city bus came an hour and a half late because it apparently broke down (Good thing i went to the stop at 12:00). While on the bus, I saw a raven flying to the left and thought: Curses! Turns out, when I got to school, Claudia and Andrew were ALREADY PRESENTING. Sigh. At least I got my graph to them.

Just an FYI

2008-06-13T11:22:58Z

I'm either not going to be writing in here AT ALL anymore, or just very rarely. So, for those of you who complain when I don't post entries, I love you, but shut it :P I'm starting to really think I've outgrown this whole "let's have my friends read about my life" deal. If you want to know, just ask. I may create another LJ way, way down the path from now, but I'm not exactly sure if I want to.
I'll leave you with this: My family's been getting along oddly well in the past few weeks... I'm saying that yes, we fight, but there's no physical abuse or aannnything. Not sure how long it will last, but I'm prayin' on the Torrah and the Bible and every other damned religious book out there that it's here to stay. I'm still saving up money to move in with Britt by the end of next year, despite this.
My bedroom is now so filled with piles and piles of books that I can't walk from the door to my bed without tripping.
I'm working really hard to actually be true to myself next year (So, hyperness = Gone. Sorry, guys).
I'm going to take one step forward, two steps back and try to talk to Hot Asian Guy (Lmfao, you knew it was coming Linds!!) by the end of the school year. Again.

I honestly do not care anymore. Okay, no, that's a lie. But I was never going to do anything about it anyway, and you ALL know it. By the way, I've heard that some of you have been talking behind her back, hopefully just to one another and not to other people, and I want you to shut up. Please, just let go of the situation, you are all SO much bigger than that. If he chose her, she's gotta be a pretty good person. I don't believe what some of you have been telling me about her giving me "death glares" because I have never seen it myself. You all know I won't do anything, because I frankly do NOT have the right, and none of you had better do anything. Just, please, grow up. Every last one of you. From the start I wanted him to be happy, and I wanted him to make the choice that HE wanted. You know that. I won't fight for something or someone that doesn't want me, because it's a waste of energy and it's pretty damn degrading. When you start to trash her around me, if you've noticed, I've always said "Shut up or I will walk away." Now, I'm going to say it again and with a twist: "Shut up or I will walk our of your life." You all need to grow up. You're in high school (for the most part, some of you are older, which kind of makes it worse XD), for God's sake!
Okay, so maybe I won't walk all the way out of your life. I'll just back off for a while, because I don't wanna lose any of you XD In fact, I've been putting this off all week so I could write it on Friday so you guys would have a weekend to blow off steam! Gah, such a big chicken am I :P Know that I love you anyway and forgive you, just also know that it's really okay to move past all of this and think about something else. Please? Thank you.

There's more I want to say, but I'm going to miss the school bus! -shrug- Whatever. See you all at school! (And this time, it's for real, as I'm noooot going to Art school! ^_^)

CRAP!

2008-06-13T11:13:19Z

T&T rat AND Family Studies rat due today!
>< I hate my luck! (Not really)

Dream: The Creation of Humanity

2008-06-13T11:07:25Z

A scientist and I (Yeah, I know, wtf?) were setting out to prove a human creation myth that everyone else in the world deemed impossible because there were no Gods, no separate entities, and the actual creation of the WORLD didn't fit in to the story at all.
The dream involved two already-human beings (Ehh? Yeah, I know, right? If they're already there as humans, how did they create humans?) and a kiss. "Not just ANY kiss," Ursula said. "The kiss of true love!"... there was a random shot of an Asian woman and a man whose ethnicity changed (Badass super power, I must say) kissing under a Japanese temple and some cherry blosoms.
From what I could actually gather from the dream, the man was in the military (Because apparently there were other human beings! So HOW is this the creation of humanity?!) and the woman was just a civillian, or maybe a lady of nobility because of her clothes in the shot where they were kissing (Shut up, shut up, everyone is equal).
Maaaaaybe the dream was a "Creation" of a certain KIND of human, or something "new" in myself? If so: IRONY, but I'm not too sure.
-shrug-
And before that dream, I had one with an Ani-Meet where Sam came exceptionally late and the MINUTE he came, Britt was called in to leave (Dunno where we were). So he and I walked her home, me giving him a massive hug as we walked (Haven't seen him in aboooout 4 or 5 months). Later that night, on MSN, I asked how the Ani-Meet was and he said: "Pretty good, got to see the two lights of my life again."
Now I KNOW I was dreaming -____-

... How?

2008-06-13T00:30:04Z

HOW is it... that I somehow painted a tiger with a perfect body, but a face that closely resembled an angry bald man?
... Maybe it's that the eyes are too big. Yeah, that's probably it actually... mmm. Hey, that helps! ^_^
How is it just my luck that the email Andrew sent Claudia and I our T&T project and I can't open it? -___- (Not actually bothering me XD Maybe I can just wing it tomorrow. I'm skillful at winging it by now).

Anyway, on a more serious note: How on EARTH does someone know who they are? I can't describe it myself, so I'm wondering if any of you want to take a whack at it. How does someone know what they're about, what they truly love, etc.?
Another serious one: How does someone just... let it flow? How does someone stop fighting themself and just give in to their ideas, feelings, etc.?

???

2008-06-11T22:29:26Z

So, where the fuck are you?

Today / Haibane Renmei / Kana

2008-06-10T00:41:23Z

Today was really, really messed up for some people. My dad tore his pants, Ben got his BIKE stolen... the best part was probably hanging out with Andrew in Business, because we were "rebelling" by sneaking candy in and eating it behind our horrible Substitute's back (He was SO mean!). It took me a while to convince Andrew to get the candy, though... he kept saying: "But you can just FLIRT with him and he'll have no problem!", to which I replied: "How 'bout I flirt with you instead?" Before proceeding to flirt with him until he gave in XD When Mike D got kicked out of the class in a dramatic fashion, I muttered: "It's like we're at the cinema!"
At the end of the day, Ben and I went in separate directions home but somehow met up at the same point in between. We stood in the shade for a while and vented about things that sucked, and ended off with a hug (That he actually participated in, wtf?) and a "We should skip Business tomorrow. We won't learn anything anyway. We could hang out for once. Notice how we haven't been doing that lately?" "Yeah, it's been weird. If the others follow, we can punch them in the ovaries."

Anyway, I'm about to copy and paste a post from my "Secret" LJ here... feel special.

One of my favourite animes / TV shows, by far, is a very unknown, 13 episode one called "Haibane Renmei". It is a series dealing mostly in identity, love, forgiveness, jealousy, loneliness and memory.
A Haibane is a being who looks like a normal human being when it arrives in the town of Glie in a cocoon, but they soon acquire wings and halos (For aesthetic reasons, NOT as a reference to Christianity) that are forged specially for them by the Haibane Renmei. Generally they are young children or teenagers, and their wings are charcoal grey and too small to be functional. Inside the cocoon, each Haibane has a vivid dream and is named after that dream when they emerge. Some Haibane (Especially young ones) choose their name based on dreams for the future. The Haibane have to follow certain rules, such as only owning second hand items or things they make themselves, not going near the walls of the city they reside in, only being allowed to work in the oldest buildings and not being allowed to handle money (Instead, they get "tickets" of sorts). Eventually, a Haibane has a "Day of Flight" / "Day of Leaving the Nest" where they go deeply into the Western Wood (Without a goodbye) and are carried away by light... leaving their halos behind.
A Sin-Bound Haibane cannot remember their dream, and have black, spotted wings. Some fans conjure that Sin-Bound Haibane committed suicide in their past lives, but they may also just be plagued by an irreprissible guilt. Some Haibane become Sin-Bound due to depression. A Sin-Bound Haibane cannot achieve their Day of Flight until they are no longer Sin-Bound, and after a certain amount of time they will cease to be Haibane. They will then be required to live apart from both Humans and Haibane.
I love this anime because the town of Glie is, basically, my own ideal city. A clocktower, cobblestone streets, an air of mystery, a forest, a place where a bunch of random people live together (Old Home, where most Haibane live, or else The Abandoned Factory)... it's perfect. Moreover, I think that the connection between Reki, Rakka and crows is a little funny XD I love that the entire anime is centred around identity. Overall, the show is aesthetically pleasing and all of the themes are ones that I tend to be drawn to. I also really like the mood the anime puts me in: sort of melancholy, but not in a depressed way, more reflective. Creative. It makes me want to help others, write, and do something all at the same time... like fix a watch, or watch a train pass by. Read a book, chill under a windmill (You'd get it if you watched the anime).

My favourite character in the story is not Reki, Rakka or Kuu (All of which are me, in combination). It isn't the lazy Nemu, the cheerful Hikari or even Kuramori (And I generally adore the random dead chicks that left some mystery or story behind). Oddly enough, this time, I am drawn to the tempermental, mechanically-inclined tomboy named Kana.
Kana's character views the crows that Rakka finds so intriguing as "scavangers", but she works to protect them (By not allowing Rakka to feed them so they don't become dependant on her and never fly free again). I like her tough, irritated character (As shown by banging pots and pans together to wake up Rakka, without remorse), but also her amazing warmth (Shown in how much she protects Rakka in episode 4 in little ways, and her many compliments). She's the reason that I'm a physical human being at all, actually; I was so drawn to her warmth that I tried to imitate it, and she expresses hers in compliments and touch (Keeping Rakka from going over the clocktower rail by putting an arm out, resting her head on Rakka's shoulder while complaining, hugging the Clock Master when he gave her a job she really wanted). I like her pride and determination, and her relationship with the clocktower's owner. Her impatience, her hardwork and "everything can be fixed" mindset. Also, in a way, she reminds me of some of the girls I'm closest to: Kelsey, Brittany, Angela (Strongly), and Alex R.

Kana: Rakka? Feeling any better now? [about being so high up on the clocktower]
Rakka: Yes, much better.
Kana: You see? You've become fearless now!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=gWX5g9YVJW4&feature=related

http://youtube.com/user/MotorradHermes THIS person has all of the Haibane Renmei episode in English, in case you don't want to listen in Japanese (Though, those are up on Youtube as well). I highly recommend watching it. It's amazing. Not gonna lie.
P.S.: COLIN, IF YOU WATCH HAIBANE RENMEI IT IS GARUNTEED THAT I READ WHEEL OF TIME.

"I choose YOU, chromodoris toxic nudibranch!"

2008-06-08T16:42:46Z

Best. Sea creature. Ever.
Cute AND deadly.
Amazingly poisonous slug.
NATASHA SHOULD HAVE ONE ON ANI. OR JENNY. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD, I'M DOING THAT. OH MY GOD.

... I seem to be a little wound up. Perhaps I should go out to Bronte to forage for food... that may calm me down. Plus, it means less reading for you guys.

Bolas Spider - Chicken Cow (NOT the Wesley Willis variety! :P)

2008-06-08T14:59:24Z

This is why we can`t hate spiders anymore: The Bolas spider. There are about three spieces in Kentucky, and many more in North America, Africa and Australia (Unsurprisingly XD). The males are sort of mysteries... they`re smaller than the females, and ready to `get it on` from birth (If you didn`t catch that, it means that they are born sexually mature). Female Bolas spiders will hang out on a branch or leaf with a single thread. At the end of this thread is a sticky ball. She waits there and puts out chemicals that...
Screw it. Just watch this, I can do this section of information NO justice:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=2UfMJJAzvbI

Also: When is a cow not a cow? WHEN IT IS A REINCARNATED TIGER.
http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,741966,00.html?promoid=googlep Huzzah for 1931.
http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,21985,21345289-5005961,00.html And huzzah for chicken-eating calfs.

This is all very `Mares of Diomedes`, eh? Maybe I should stop before I scare someone... or, worse, show you pictures of things that were found inside the stomach of a Crocodile!

Bit bloodthirsty of me.

If you can`t tell, I`m in a very animal-obsessed mood.

FINALLY!

2008-06-08T14:34:01Z

Okay, so one of the things that I've never really thought about is what my favourite song would be. This is because I, like 100000000000 people on the planet, have always liked far too many songs to really "have" a favourite.
However, the other day, I finally realized: There is only one song that I love no matter who is singing it, that can be tweaked pleasingly into any tempo or style, and that means the entire world to me. No, it's not "Spin", or "Move Along" or even "Ever Ever After". It isn't by Nick Drake or Rosemary Clooney or the Beatles.
It's "The Last Unicorn"! XD I'm starting to believe I love this story a tad too much.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=CPnhBXNUVDI Original version.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=IycWPksv0Bw Loreena McKinnett version.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=4WWqvgvXctY Delcan Galbraith version.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=NhNdQOx29Vk Kenny Loggins version.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Uy9xjwcsHU4 And now for the crazy, uplifting version by Groove Coverage.

An Anian Fairy-Tale

2008-06-08T01:14:17Z

A board I did on Ani a LOOONG while back.
Written here juuust because I am very proud of it / love it to death. You really don't have to read it, it's massive. I have a key here, in case I forget my characters / if you actually choose to read it.

-All the characters, except for Virgina and the animals (and other people's characters) were "me" one upon a time-

Danielle (Mistakenly called "Alexandra" at one point) = Most like me at the time. Somewhat inept Witch. Her enemy is Maurika.
Natasha = My original Ani character, mother to Jade (In the future, at least). Among the most powerful of Witches, with an enemy (Ulia). Was called "Silver One" by Ulia growing up, because of her hair. Very sad, very wise, very beautiful.
Jade = Daughter of Natasha. Posesses a soul that has been through many different time periods, fighting an enemy named Ninya with three other time-travelling spirits. Was born before Natasha came to Ani, and had her body's age sped up so she could fight along side her mother. Very reckless, very flirtacious.
Miranda = Most like my mom. Was pregnant when this was written.
Virgina = Highly boring character, sister to Natasha.
Diana = Natasha's familiar. Usually quite bitchy, despite being a cat, and very strict.
Maurika = New enemy, cousin of Ulia, Caro (Natasha's mother), Crystalline (Miranda's enemy) and Ninya.

Most normal and sane people wouldn't have been awake this early in the morning. It was about 3:00, Danielle guessed. She'd left her house at about 12:00, and had flown on her broom at top speed across the ocean to Sirath - shaving about five hours off of the boat ride that she normally taken. She'd stayed relatively low to the water because she was afraid of flying too high, and she had been hit by spray and waves multiple times, making her clothing a little more than moist. Her hair was a mess, but that was quickly fixed by a few tugs of her hairbrush (Which, like a book, was something she rarely left home without it seemed).
Not only was Danielle out at a weird time, but she was dressed in weird clothing. Well, not too weird... for someone who wasn't her. She was wearing a blue dress, which in itself was peculiar, but she was also wearing her classic brown hiking boots with this. Her hair had been changed to brown, along with her eyes, and her nose was reduced ((I wish I could do that!)). She looked quite different. If it weren't for her general shape and size, she would be unrecognizable to most people.
Danielle didn't even know why she was out at this time. She didn't know why she was awake. All she did know was that she couldn't sleep, that she'd felt an urge to come to Sirath and that in the breif dream that she'd had there had been whispers of gold and hisses of silver.
Oh, what was I thinking? Danielle thought bitterly, sitting down at a table outside of a closed coffee shop and resting her chin in one of her hands. Nothing's open, no one's around. Why am I here?
What really pissed her off, too, was that she was beginning to feel cold and she was wearing a dress with shortsleeves. She'd left her coat at home, and had forgotten the spell for retreiving items from afar. She felt agitated.
Why the heck am I even here?
Meanwhile, Jade, Natasha and Miranda all awoke from their slumbers back at the Ashori house. They had the exact same dream, one filled with the fears that each had for the future. Jade screamed and rushed out to the common room, feeling as if the innocent darkness around her were trying to capture and destroy her. Natasha and Miranda, upon hearing this, came out as well.
But the common room, once filled with chairs and couches and videogames and carpets, looked completely different.
The girls found themselves to be on a long traintrack, leading to no where, in the middle of the night. There was wind blowing all around them, the cold air beckoning tears from their once dry eyes. There was a vast feeling of emptiness and loneliness that seemed to be connected to the No Where Land that they had entered by stepping out of the safety of their bedrooms. It was a cold, horrible place that they had somehow gotten to. All were confused; they could see their bedroom doors, and the bedroom doors of every other Anian, but when Miranda tried to walk over to Jeff's to wake him up she couldn't move backwards. She could only move forwards.
"What's going on?" Natasha yelled into the wind, but Miranda noticed that her voice sounded far away despite how close she was.
Virgina also came out from her bedroom, her face oiled from sleep and her hair braided prettily.
"What is this?" She asked, her cornflower eyes widening in surprise. Diana followed her, a look of powerful cat-knowledge around her. The animal was the only one who wasn't fighting back a shreik terror. For some reason, though, every single one of them felt lonely... something that they had never felt, as long as they had one another, until this moment. For Natasha and Virgina, it was a terrible way to feel nostalgic. They had been lonely for years.
"I know this magic!" She announced. Her tone was grave, and the moment that her next sentance was uttered she sounded like bile coated her tongue. Her next phrase brought into a room an understanding, although only Natasha and Virgina knew why. "It belongs to Maurika!"
Natasha gasped and pulled her pajamas tightly around herself, as if the room was suddenly even more fridged. Virgina began to cry, hard, and Miranda put an arm around her.
"Miranda!" Virgina whispered hoarsely. "We must go and find Alexandra. I know where she is. I know that you're not in the condition to -"
"I am!" Miranda said feircely. "I can help. Don't worry! Virgina, run and get the broo -"
"Already done." Virgina said, using magic to make two brooms appear in front of them. She handed one to Natasha, and got on her own. Miranda climnbed on the back, as she was unable to fly by herself.
"Mom?" Jade asked. This made Natasha freeze for a second. Jade never called her 'Mom'. "Mom, what's going on? Why do I feel like I know that name?"
Natasha didn't answer. Instead, she roughly pulled Jade onto the broom with her. Using her magic, she blasted open the common room window. It was raining outside of the Ashori House, a dramatic lightning storm with wind that matched the air inside.
"Mom!" Jade yelled as she and Natasha flew out the window. She'd been deprived of her childhood, because of Ester turning her into a sixteen-year-old from a four year old. However, at that moment, she'd never felt younger. "Why do I know that name?"
he four girls landed in Sirath, by Danielle. There was no storm in Sirath whatsoever... but the four girls met with a sight that scared them more than a cat would be afraid of the storm.
Danielle was standing, alone, in front of a giant creature. The creature was a woman, who was taller than the tallest building in Sirath. She was large with power - so much power... it was almost impossible for her to shrink to a normal height, because she held so much magic that she simply could not compress it. Her face itself was as large as a three story house, and her face wasn't exactly ugly but it was not beautiful either. It, too, was laden with dark forces.
"Maurika!" Natasha shouted as she got off her broom. "Stop!"
Maurika gazed down at Natasha, having to squint a little. "Ah! SILVER ONE!" She howled in delight. Her laugh was surprisingly warm, for one like her. Natasha shuddered at the usage of her old nickname.
"Mom... why do I know her?" Jade asked quietly. Natasha opened her mouth to answer, but it was Virgina who did.
"Maurika is Ulia’s right-hand Witch. She was Ulia’s first cousin, but had moved to London when she turned twenty in human years. She returned some Witch years - about six years in mortal time - later to assist Ulia in their jointed dreams… whatever those may have been. She has been with Ulia for as long as I can remember. She was born in another galaxy, unlike Ulia... her galaxy is the oldest known, the galaxy that Aviemere resides in. Maurika is older than Natasha by thousands of millenia."
Jade felt like she needed to sit down, but she knew that she couldn't under the circumstances.
"Do we fight?" Miranda asked meekly.
"Fight?" Maurika asked. She laughed again, and Miranda covered her ears. "No! We do not fight! I am here to do as I planned."
Virgina didn't like the sound of that. She held out an arm to push Miranda back behind her, in case something happened.
"And what do you plan?" Jade asked. She'd always been the bravest of the five girls.
Maurika looked down at Danielle, who was staring up at her with a stoney expression on her unattractive face.
"DANIELLE!" Natasha shouted. "MOVE!"
But when had Danielle been one to pay attention when she was in a dream?
"You killed my cousin. You changed her! Well, I've changed her back... we are together again! We will vanquish you! We will kill you! We have oh so many plans, waiting for the five of you! You wait and see! You'll pay for what you did to us, to our coven - PAY!"
Maurika began to cast her spell... her raging spell of hate and loathing.
"Gold, silver, copper and stone,
Break from one another and become thy own
Forget each other and become
A lonely number, the number one.
Gold... rust.
Silver... die.
Copper... lose.
Stone... sigh."
At that moment, Virgina gaped. Jade, who she assumed was Gold, bent over. Her skin became wrinkled, and her body became frail. Her muscles loosened and hung uselessly on her body. Her beautiful blonde hair became the colour of moonlit snow. Jade rusted... she was an old lady.
Thank God, Natasha, the obvious Silver, didn't die. It seemed that her little episode in the hospital had already sealed her fate, the fate of life. Perhaps Danielle's Life Magic had yet to wear off on the girl.
Danielle, Copper, too, seemed uneffected. As her True Love had already been stolen by the Fates, she had nothing left to lose.
But Miranda had the hardest sacrifice. She had to suffer the most out of every girl. She lost something worse than her True Love, or her beauty, or even her own life. Danielle, Natasha, Virgina and Jade watched helplessly as colourless magic encircled Miranda's stomach, where her baby was, and clenched its twisted hand around it. Miranda bellowed in fear and pain as her baby was taken from her stomach for a split moment, and the powers of Darkness that Maurika held spread through its hardly flowing blood. Then, the baby... a child of Darkness... was put back inside of Miranda, waiting to be born and waiting to destroy.
"No! Oh, dear God, no!" Miranda exclaimed, as her stomach pulsed with the poison of evil.
Maurika laughed again. "That was fun! We'll have to do it again!" She said. She smiled, a sickeningly beautiful sight, before bidding the five girls farewell. "Ta!"
And she was gone.
"This can't... this can't be... this can't be happening!" Miranda looked absolutely miserable. She fell to her knees and began to slam her fist over and over on to the ground, her sorrow erupting in loud sobs. No one, not even Danielle, made a move to comfort her. Natasha, for one, knew that the hurt of losing one's child was uncurable.
"It is." Jade's now-frail voice said. "It is. And for that reason, we must think of a way to get that B-itch Witch back."
With tears in her eyes, Virgina said that she would go back and get Diana. She left and came back quickly, and during that time Sirath was only filled with the sound of Miranda's crying. No one could bring themselves to utter a word.
Diana looked, somehow, regal. There was no other way to put it. She knew what to do and the idea of somehow being a little safe made the cat look like she owned the world. For the sake of comic releif, Danielle pictured her in a velvet blue cape for a moment before trying to get herself back to the real world. Once she did that, she noticed that Diana had somehow managed to turn Jade back into her normal form.
"What can fix this?" Natasha asked, looking at Miranda instead of Diana as she spoke. Her voice was filled with empathy.
Diana didn't raise her eyes to meet any of the girl's eyes. The truth was so complicated, even if it could be summed up in a simple word.
"Power." She replied bluntly.
Jade, a teenager once again, laughed bitterly. "Power?" She asked. "POWER! What power do we have, compared to Maurika?"
She grunted and kicked a near by can. Virgina winced, afraid of her neice's unrelenting anger. "I'll go back and get the others." She suggested, before flying off to retreave the other Anians from the Ashori House. She knew that at least eight of them had decided to spend the night there.
"You have a strong power, actually. All of you. Minus Virgina." Diana said, looking like some sort of Yoda again. "You all have a certain inner strength. The four of you, put together, can represent four of the main elements of Good in the universe. There is strength in numbers. Maurika is one... she represents Loathing, much like Ulia represented Cruelty."
"Oh?" Jade asked, still looking pretty pissed off. "And what do we represent?"
"That, I am unsure of. For that reason, I must use one of my nine lives to transform you four." Diana said. She would only have seven Lives left, but she didn't care. This was for the best.
"Transform us?" Natasha said, looking confused. For a split second, Miranda's tears quieted as she listened to Diana.
"Yes. I'm uncertain of what powers the four of you seperately hold. Since that is true, I must bring out from your soul who you really are. Ulia and Maurika's physical appearances are direct reflections of their souls. In a moment, you three will look like who you are as well."
Danielle felt scared at the idea. Jade was excited. Natasha felt curious. Miranda felt ready for anything.
"Let's do it" Jade announced. At that moment, the other Anians landed with Virgina in Sirath... to witness a great beginning.
Now," Diana said. She was ready to cast the spell needed to transform Danielle, Natasha, Miranda and Jade. "Say one phrase, anything that comes to you, that you feel represents who you are. Anything that comes to you, be it a presaid quote by someone else or something that you yourself think."
The girls thought on it.
Natasha was the first to speak, and when she did she was engulfed by aqua and silverlight.
"If I could hide forever, I would."
Next came Jade, smiling hugely. She was covered in orange and gold light.
"Nothing is going to stop me."
Miranda was after that, a hand on her stomach protectively. She was taken by a green and grey light.
"Never posess a lying heart."
Finally, an unsure Danielle finished and she was lifted into the sky by a red and copper light.
"If I make one life better, I'll have found my home."
The four girls disappeared completely for a moment, hidden by their own personal light. The world stopped to breathe for them and them alone, as they became in perfect harmony with themselves and each other. Their inner selves slowly began to overtake their outerselves.
Impatient Jade came down first, and she was pretty of course. Her hair was auburn, reflecting her short temper. Her eyes were large and green as the forests in which she loved to run. Her body was strong, just like her emotions were. Her large, red lips represented her openness to love (Which, by the way, was the one physical trait that all four girls had in common now). She was also tall, which was because of her high self esteem. She wore an orange shirt and gold pants. On her neck was a gold necklace that had, written on it, the aspect of Good that she held: HOPE.
Then came motherly and fair Miranda, wrapped in a flowing green and grey dress. Her eyes were a warm hazel, a colour soothing to most people. Her skin was a vivid pink, which meant happiness. She was a little plump; good natured. Her nose was a little big, representing an ability to sense danger. Her hair was bright, bright blonde - both ditziness and trust. Her smile showed large, white, even teeth - friendliness. Her necklace, made of stone, said: TRUTH.
Natasha, the one who had suffered so much, was next. She wore an aqua skirt and a silver shirt. Her skin tone was ash black, showing the pain that she had gone through. Her hair was also black, which meant that she found it hard to trust. Her eyes, strangely, matched the colour of her skirt, which meant an introverted personality. She was slim and still the most beautiful of the three girls who had appeared, but her muscles weren't as strong as Jade's were. Her nails were long, which made her defensive. Her necklace read: EMOTIONS.
Danielle came next. Whether she was beautiful or not is up to the Anians to say in their posts. Her necklace had LOVE written on it, of course. Her lips were also red. However, the rest is up to the Anians and their imaginations and what they've read here... if someone could please post their idea for Danielle's apperance, that would rock.
"There." Diana said. "Now you are ready."
"For what?" Jade asked.
"For training."

Loook.. I Made A Meme...

2008-06-08T00:12:40Z

Choose a Person: Britt.

If You Had To Paint a Picture for Them, What Would Be In It? Red background. Orange and yellow dragon in the centre, coilled around a large ruby. Crow in the upper left corner. At the bottom, the cheshire cat (Hiding in the tree that the Lost Boys used as an entrance to their house). Upper right corner, a flying rubber chicken. Maybe a pirate's ship somewhere, maybe a book somewhere. There'd be a boarder composed of a sword (top), a bone (right side), a vine with night flowers on it (left side) and a flame (bottom).

Last Year's Theme Song!

2008-06-07T23:15:02Z

http://youtube.com/watch?v=KqLkRdTKCL4

Bolded where it counts. Italicized where it means something to me that it wouldn't to you XD Both bolded and italicized where you may be able to guess where I'm getting at/at least one person would get it.

I'd rather I chase your shadow all my life
Than be afraid of my own
I'd rather be with you
I'd rather not know
Where I'll be than
Be alone and convinced that I know

When the world keeps spinning round
My world's upside down
And I wouldn't change a thing
I've got nothing else to lose
I lost it all when I found you
And I wouldn't change a thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing *

Everything I know has let me down
So I will just let go
Let you turn me inside out
Cause I know I'm not sure
about anything
But you wouldn't have it any other way

When the world keeps spinning round
My world's upside down
And I wouldn't change a thing
I've got nothing else to lose
I lost it all when I found you
And I wouldn't change a thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing

Spinning turning watching burning
All my life has found its meaning
Walking crawling climbing falling
All my life has found its meaning

You and I wouldn't change a thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing

When the world keeps spinning round
My world's upside down
And I wouldn't change a thing
I've got nothing else to lose
I lost it all when I found you
And I wouldn't change a thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing

No, you and I wouldn't change a thing

* That line counts for more things than just the obvious one.

I-i-i-if you want to share a song, reply. THOUGH NONE OF YOU WILL -___-

It's Easier To Believe

2008-06-06T02:42:32Z

Seriously... talking to Jeremiah was amazing today... it was SO out-of-the-blue and out of the ordinary, which made it perfect... and then Ben, too... And EVERYTHING with Jordan as well (We talked more than we have in months today)... talking to Cameron for the first time in a while was pretty great...
Also, you HAVE to love that Teija and Angela for abducting me tonight for an hour or two. We went to Angela's (Empty) house and talked, then when Teija left, Ang and I just walked around the town in the dark. We saw lightning and heard thunder, which made it so much better.
I'll throw in some Jeff-love, too, because he sort of hung out with us (More like yelling comments on our conversation from the TV room) for the first time tonight. Apparently, he talked more than usual! XD
Gotta love friendship...
And that thunderstorm.

Ahaha, Andrew is Amazing

2008-06-05T23:50:47Z

I just told Andrew (Not T&T Andrew, the one you all know) that I am staying at Blakelock because the Art Program is coming to our school.
His reply? "Amanda's so cool that she doesn't have to go to a new school, because the Art Program is coming to HER."
XD

Whooooa!

2008-06-05T20:46:51Z

Today was soo crazy, mainly because of the Assembly. First period was dead boring, but during the Assembly I sat with Ben, Scott, Cameron, Jordan and George... and didn't pay attention to ANYTHING going on XD
Jordan and I kept jabbing one another through the whole thing, muttering "Hey, big girl", "Hey chum", "Hey chumpette", "Hey sport", "Hey sportette", "Hey champ", "Hey champette" and at one point he said "Hey, gal!"... he thought he won, but ooooh no, I caught him with a "Hey, lad!"... and when Mr Manias was called to the stage (The only part we were listening for at all), we were the only two to stand and clap for him (As he approached, not as he decended)... until some random blond guy across the room came to our rescue, because CAMERON IS A TRAITOR! :P
In Business class, the guys left during the "Voting" thing (Because we had a sub) but Andrew stayed behind. At the start of the class, because I was late (I was trying to find food!), the sub decided to hate me. By the end of it, she and I were joking around and talking about things currently going on in the business world, and things that happened in the past, etc.
We didn't go out for Ice Cream today, because Claudia had a presentation to do... but, oh yes, tomorrow... THAT is when...
Fourth period was sort of boring. So was Fifth. At the end of the day, I ran into Jeremiah... then went over to Ben's to drag him out of the house to hang out for a while.
Oh, and this morning, my parents were QUITE tactful and had a fight in front of Jeremiah. Whoo.
Annnd now I am baracading myself in my bedroom for the rest of the night.

This Is For Jera - To Cheer Him Up

2008-06-05T10:59:30Z

Out of desperation a while ago, to help revive Ani, I emailed Mario. I told him that we all missed him, and wanted him back ASAP. I wasn't even sure if he'd get the message...
And this morning, he emailed me back :)

"Great! I Get To Chase Someone! I LOVE MY JOB!'

2008-06-04T23:59:32Z

I think that weird happy feeling from last night has stuck to me. There wasn't a down moment all day... okay, hearing that Claudia's aunt died was pretty bad. But I convinced Najiba to help me hijack / surprise her during third period tomorrow so we can get ice cream at her favourite place (TCBY) to cheer her up :) She doesn't know yet - so SHH! :P We should definately blindfold her. And talk in Man voices so she gets really freaked out. Maaybe bring our money in a big, canvas sack with a dollar sign on it. And have plastic guns. Better yet: WATER GUNS! Jeez, wouldn't Mrs Robinson laugh if I came to Math all wet from a watergun fight?
Adam M's also asked me to teach him Clarinet (because he needs to know how to play it for a competition). Teija and I also taunted Kelly from outside of her history room today, and she pretended to strip for us (With Sebastian watching and just laughing - caught his eye a few times and laughed AT him, mouthing "I feel for you" or "I'll make this up to you" XD)... until Mr Bernier saw us and we had to run for our lives!! Also, with Teija and Angela when I got out of Math 10 minutes early, while trying to think of things to do together, I suggested (In a girly, obnoxious tone) that we should make a joint Father's Day dinner and make them "BFFL - just like us"... and we MAY actually do it now!! :P Oh, and I also got Angela's brother to string real sentances together!! (He's one of those teenagers who basically grunts, if he isn't playing guitar, but he's really funny and nice, so it's worth getting a few words out of him... didn't talk to him enough last night, shamefully).
The quote from the title is from Mr Stainton as he chased after Claudia (Who tried to get out of T&T five minutes early XD).
I'd write more, but I don't want to jinx certain things. However, I WILL say that Britt's latest artistic endevor involves drawing all her friends as characters from Alice in Wonderland :)
Love ya, talk to you later!

P.S. : JERA, I HOPE YOUR DAY TURNED OUT BETTER THAN YOU THOUGHT IT WOULD... SMILE :D

daylight_aurora @ 2008-06-03T21:47:00

2008-06-04T02:12:08Z

In spite of everything that's happened lately - or, perhaps, because of everything that's happened lately - the concert tonight was the best I've ever gone to while at Blakelock.
I spent the night with no particular group or person (odd for me, though I'm friends with a lot of groups). I was with Keely and Tiffany for a while... Colin the longest, perhaps... unless you count Adam, because I wore his sweater all night so it was like he was "with" me without actually BEING there XD... all the chior members (Particularly Garret, for some weird reason)... Joe and a bunch of other girls whose names I didn't catch... Thom quite a lot... Alex and Zoe (a fair bit) and Rachel. FOR SOME REASON, THERE WAS ALMOST NO NING-TIME. MAYBE BECAUSE SHE OVERSTRESSES HERSELF ;) (Gotta give you props for surviving this year, sweetheart).
Thom saranaded me when he thought I looked sad and lonely while I was reading... not sure if it was "Fairest" or "Nobody's Princess". He tried to get Joe to sing, too, at one point. Again: Stole Adam's sweater (Which is actually SO comfortable!) and drew funny pictures on the blackboard with Zoe (They were amazing, shut up). Alex and I joked around a lot, mostly when the entire thing was over and I was waiting for Colin so we could leave... we decided to get matching Velvet Underground shirts and wear them every Wensday next year and spend the WHOLE day together (One week we'd go to her classes, one week to mine)... imagine if we actually did that? XD
When the chior sang, we were WAY off. Colin thought we were good, but I'm pretty sure we could all agree that it wasn't even as good as practice. Cassandra and Gabby and I just laughed through most of it, and I kept mouthing "Jazz hands" to Garret (Codeword for "We messed up").
When the band played (Went to the very last one, the others I read through XP), I thought they were very good. I'm not going to lie, I was really happy through it all... mostly because I was all cheesy and thinking "Aww, I love my friends!" and "I'm so proud!" etcetera. I caught Alex's eye a few times and tried not to laugh... mind, I was already smiling quite a bit. Seriously, I don't know WHAT upped my estrogen dosage today, but I was feeling really proud of you all tonight... and really amused (Colin's hair kept blowing in the air that came from crashing the symbols). My face muscles feel SO cramped from how much I smiled tonight, just watching you guys up on that stage. I just kept thinking: God, I love them. Over and over. Because I do, did, and will.
And now?
Still clinging on to that very light feeling. And my emoticon is crashing in perfect beat with the I'm listening to.
Anyway, I'm feeling very... don't want to say "Pure", but that's sort of it. Sort of. I'm not sure how to describe it. "Happy" doesn't seem like the correct term, either. Or "Simple", because there's something really complicated woven into this true joy. It could just be the afterglow of all that love from before... but it's put me in a great mood to fall asleep to.

Lordy...

2008-06-03T16:27:23Z

... Is it weird that my dog was just barking his head off, I heard a person enter my house (I'm in my room, door closed), the dog shut up and now I hear the person creaking around downstairs... and I'm not scared at all?
Maybe it's because I have a candle next to me so I can burn said intruder if I so desire. But I'm no where NEAR a phone and...
Okay, now they're coming upstairs. Shoot. Maybe I'm a wee bit worried now. But I have scizzors and a mug and a lamp and a hell load of notebooks to whip at the person... and a lighter!

-cocky, joking, sarcastic voice- So, I did this in case I die. Just so you guys can inform the police that someone broke and entered into my house. If I'm about to die: LOVE YA!
This REALLY IS the worst time to need to pee.

Edit: I think the person's gone. I heard the front door close. But now I'm not sure if it's wise to leave the room and go to the bathroom... ugh, I should just urinate on whoever it is if they come at me with a knife or something.

EDIT: Lordy, they're back. Did they get a truck or something? Shoo, fly.

When you read this, please reply and I will write down three (or more) things that I like about you. I feel charitable :P

I Have Discovered The Meaning of Life...

2008-06-03T02:45:42Z

... And it is: Royally pissing off Colin until he finally calls you at 10:00 to hear you say four words ("I'M STAYING AT BLAKELOCK") and proceeding to totally distract him from his history essay for an hour afterward. The only reason that we got off the phone is because he "wanted" me to get some rest (Catonese for "He wanted to finish his essay"), but you see, the fact that I knew what I was doing by talking so much prooves that there is NO rest for the wicked.

Also: WE HAVE A CONCERT TOMORROW?! ... Damn. Guess I'll be at school at 4:30... see you then, guys.

Survey

2008-06-02T19:12:30Z

OH MY GAWD, I feel like I've been trapped in Maxime Bernier's great, hairy Y-Fronts all day!!!!

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
First, I thought Saint Peter was at the Pearly Gates. Second, What would I like to hear God say? "Yo! Go through door number 1, the answer to all of life's questions is there." But what do I think God will really say? "Go to Hell, go to Hell, do not pass 'go,' do not collect $200." According to the Scriptures, I am (as it were) toast. But that's just if you go by the Scriptures...

Last time you consumed alcohol?
Church.

When was the last time you saw your best friend?
Yesterday.

What were you doing at 8:00 this morning?
Sleeping & nightmare-ing (Woke up at 8:15 because of it, then nodded off again)

What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
Trying to stand up?

How do you feel about the person who texted you last?
I don't have a cell.

Three words to explain why you last threw up?
I'd say it, but...

How's your heart lately?
Still ticking.

Where did your last hug take place?
In Brittany's family room

Who was the last person to hold your hand?
Britt

Did you have a good birthday this year?
It was relatively decent, I guess.

Are you tired right now?
HECK YES!

Have you ever been called a tease?
No... yes... maybe. As a joke, a few times.

Three days from now will you be in a relationship?
HELL no!

How old will you be in 11 months?
17

Was yesterday better than today?
Yes

What does your last text message say?
"Get a cell phone!"

What month is your birthday in?
March

When was the last time you saw your dad?
Last night

Relationship status?
I'd like to be in a committed relationship, but I'm not desperate. I can wait. Whatever.

What is your favorite color?
All of them

Do you like coffee?
Iced

Do you like iced tea?
One of my favourite drinks.

Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
Right.

Do you know how to play poker?
No

What were you doing at 12:00 last night?
Sleeping

Do you smile a lot?
Yes

Do you know how to drive a stick shift?
Not yet, but I'll probably end up learning

What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
Books, CDs, movies, videogames, gardening stuff, tea, ART SUPPLIES... more books.

Do you wear any jewelry?
Nope

What time did you go to sleep last night?
11:30...

Where did you sleep last besides your own bed?
The church

Have you ever kissed someone?
Yes

Have you ever done yoga?
Nope, but my mom thinks I should start

When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
Trust me, I was not capable of coherent thought when I first looked in the mirror this morning.

Do you know any foreign languages?
I know bits and pieces of several languages.

Are you crushing?
I am crushing you up like a soda can, dawg.

Who was the last person you had in your car?
Kevin

What was the last movie you saw in theaters?
The Strangers

How are you feeling?
Anxious, sick

Who do you text the most?
No one

Are you going on vacation this summer?
Yes

What's the area code for your cell phone?
Don't have a cell

Where did you buy the shirt you're wearing now?
Hand-me-down

What is the closest purple thing to you?
Something in the newspaper -gets distracted-

When you're at the grocery store do you use the self checkout?
Yes

If you were abandoned in the wilderness, would you survive?
I'd like to think so.

Colin! GET OVER HERE! / Sickerooni.

2008-06-02T15:35:54Z

"It's like the sickness has evolved... like the giant ants in Them!"

I-i-i-if you haven't noticed, I am NOT at school. This is because I am so exhausted that I can barely move, yet am extremely hungry. So I keep moving from the kitchen to my bedroom, and am thinking of relocating to the Family Room... but that involves moving, and trying to lift all of my books at the same time. I also have a high fever and keep getting muscle spasms in my lower stomach. I think I'm gonna drag my sorry butt to school tomorrow anyway, though... if it's garunteed to not be Hell with flourecent lighting, but that is NEVER a garuntee anymore.
Also: As soon as COLIN reads this, he needs to get his egghead OVER here!! Because there's something that needs to be said.

Well, THIS is a Switch!

2008-06-02T01:31:40Z

Bleh!
On Friday, I stayed home because my body ran completely out of juice. Saturday, I felt around the same all day... today, I fought it... and that seems to have been a mistake. I can barely stand up...
My mom thinks I'm depressed. My dad thinks I am physically ill. I just think my body's decided to go and have a meltdown without propperly preparing me. Sometimes I'll be crying, other times I'll be asleep, other times I'll be stocking up on food... d'ya think it's both? Though I'm not sure what I'd be so depressed about. The things I've been saying are excuses... they can't possibly be what's making me sad... right?
Whatever this is, it sucks. Hopefully it's just a physical thing, those are cured easier.
Cutting this short because typing isn't working too well.